I finished the script for Beanstalk Volume 2 yesterday. The celebration is short lived, however; they always are. I guess you could say I rejoiced by going to PrintWorks to buy a hard copy of it. 129 pages. I’ve already started making changes.

I’m a lot more relaxed with myself this time around. I’m not a perfectionist all at once, because I know the process now. That doesn’t mean I’m not still a freak concerning the big idea and a freak about the details. But it certainly doesn’t help to get uptight about it.

I’m also more patient working with people. I’m not an executive, even though I’m hardwired to feel like one.  I’m directing a collaboration of talented artists; we are creating a visual anthology of Edgar Allan Poe’s short stories and poems. The artist contract is new for me, and there have been some disagreements among the group regarding its contents. It’s hard to find artists who are driven. They’re often in the type-b percentile, but this crew feels right. And even if some of them don’t end up sticking until the end, who cares? I’d love for them to be a part of it. I think all of them have a lot to offer, and potentially a lot to gain, from the experience. But if they can’t commit, they’re out. It’s a great project, and if they fail to deliver, that’s their loss.

Not really one for big celebrations, I’m getting back to work.


My Writing Process

Starting on my second graphic novel, in the series Beanstalk, I’m already on page 50 at least in my script. It’s going a lot quicker than my first book, and I can’t quite pinpoint why. I don’t think about it as often when I’m at work. (It used to be all I daydreamed about, before some guy punched Richard Spencer, and now that’s all I can dream of doing. I think of that, and Kellyann Conway’s “alternative facts.”)

It could be that I’m not as good at this anymore, or it could be I’ve gotten better. There was a time when the simple task of waiting on tables was daunting, but now I do that with such ease so as it does not register if I’m talking to you, while I’m thinking about something completely different. “Would like fruit or potatoes for your side?” In my head I’m contemplating Rousseau’s ideas on civil liberty, because I am a big nerd like that.

I’ve started this new graphic novel with a rather unexpected side plot. Dennis is a character I had no intention of reviving, but he has become a central part of this project. He is somewhat of an automaton, as I believe a number of scientists and engineers are in reality. (That doesn’t mean all of them are self serving pricks without any intention of serving the greater good.) He got into this business, because he was good at differential equations, and it made him feel good to be competent at something. I feel like that’s something we can all relate to at least on some level, (even if you failed algebra 2 twice in high school ((Guilty!))


Author Proof in the Mail!

My author proof came in the mail yesterday! Unfortunately, one of my pages was printed at less than 300 dpi. However, I have since fixed that and several other issues. Abobe Indesign is being difficult and won’t let me export this new and improved pdf, so I have to open up a new document and replace a bunch of images. Ain’t nothin’ but a thang when you’re so close though. It will take me several hours. Arghh! I’m working on pushing through things though while keeping a positive attitude. I mean, I’m going to be holding my very own Goddam book within the next two weeks. Yesterday was just a precursor to that excitement, as you can see in the pictures below. 😀12301614571230161459

Book Cover!

Here’s a link to my book cover, guys! I had to design it myself, because I’m such a control freak. But I like it quite a bit.


Createspace is done reviewing my interior pdfs, so they’re all good to go. (Crying while looking at Adobe Indesign, until I got it figured out, really was the route to go. Now they are just reviewing my cover. Hopefully that is A-ok too.

Stay tuned for more updates, guys. I’m not sure what day my book will be released, but hopefully within the week!

A Little Bit of Crying

Whelp, it took a little bit of crying, but I think I finally figured out how to format my book so that createspace will accept it. I’ve had to add these new borders; I opted to make them colorful. I think they look pretty snazzy.


I had attempted to contact my old graphic design professor. He emailed me back pronto, but after I gave him the specifications that I needed for margins and whatnot, I just have this feeling he’s not going to email me back. Maybe he’s busy with the holiday. Maybe it went into his spam folder. Maybe he doesn’t care. Whatever. I think I’ve got it now.

It was a long, hard day. Work was so monotonous, for some reason I couldn’t comprehend. I usually love working. I think my energy was a little stagnant. I’ve been waking up congested, and with a lack of purpose since my book has lost momentum.

And I’m a little homesick. And when I’m homesick I latch on to my boyfriend. He’s the only person I’m ever vulnerable around. (I should really work on making more friends so he doesn’t have to bear the brunt of it.) He was out of town these past couple days for his job. He’s at a friend’s tonight. He works hard and deserves to blow off some steam. It’s also not his fault I’m needy, but I’m still took it personally, even if it wasn’t rational. (You and I are both glad to know I didn’t voice my personal affront. I mean, I’m completely fine right now.) Who wants to hang out with a red, poofy faced girlfriend, frustrated at her computer, when you could drink a cool refreshing beer with your friends? Mmmmm… I should drink a beer right now. That would make me feel a lot better.

I probably just need some sleep. I mean, I was just staring at a trial version of InDesign, weeping. I’m not normally a person who weeps.

But I think I’ve got it figured out now. Good night, World!


A New Project in the Works

Because of how Amazon’s algorithms work, I’ve decided to opt out of doing a Kickstarter campaign, (Just for this year! Possibilities abound in the future…) I’ve decided a better way to build my brand, for now, is to publish another work within 90 days after publishing Beanstalk.

Parents have been asking me if Beanstalk is a children’s book. Alas, it is not. There is language, gore and swamp monster nudity!

New canvas.jpg

However, that doesn’t mean I haven’t had dreams for a different demographic. I have nephews. I know that my siblings are constantly looking for movies and books that can also be entertaining for the adults, because you’ll have to watch/read these mediums over and over again.

I have always been interested in how computers transformed from big bulking masses into something so compact. A smartphone fits in your pocket. I’ve compiled some images of that history, from Hewlett-Packard to Bill Gates Vs. Steve Jobs. This book is going to light a fire in some kids, I think.


Here is one image from a newly proposed book.

And coinciding with this image, I might have a paragraph that goes like this: Computers have been around for the past 50 years, even though they haven’t always looked like the ones you’re used to seeing. These big computers, like the one in the picture above, were used by the government or corporations; nobody had a computer in their house! These computers used vacuum tubes instead of transistors.

And then I’d have images of vacuum tubes/transistors and explain what they are, very elementally. I would also explain what these big computers were used for, like calculating formulas or breaking codes during WW2. I will have a section about Alan Turing and his work regarding the breaking of Nazi code..


I plan on making a series of these kid friendly books . I have always been interested in the history of scientists/engineers as well as their collaboration with entrepreneurs. I think that not only kids could be entertained but that it could be educational as well for the parents.

I want to explore the science of evolution, geology and climate change in another sort of these books. Maybe even an atheist/agnostic or secular humanist’s explanation for natural phenomena. I want these kids to experience the wonderment of the natural world through story just like their Christian counterparts do.

In the comments below, let me know what you or your kids would be interested in!



I relented and decided to pay createspace.com to review my files, and fix them accordingly, if they can. The sales woman was very nice, and I’m glad they provide this service, even if I am disheartened that I have resorted to using it. People pay publishers and editors everyday. So why do I feel like such a failure? I thought I could do this on my own. And I probably could, but it would take time and possibly some angry swear words at my pdf files.

A lot of aspiring authors become melancholy upon receiving rejection letters. It was never my plan to go that route, as I am a self-proclaimed control freak. I think that if self-publishing was made for someone, it was made for me. But if I had gone that traditional route, getting rejection letters wouldn’t bother me so much. I know a lot of  people aren’t like me in that way. Authors can be a sensitive lot; their weakness is their strength. The only thing that might bother me is waiting around and the cruel inefficiency of it.(People think that I’m a robot, but they haven’t met my boyfriend. I am the coldest human, and he is the warmest machine-my sexy robot.) When it comes to rejection, in this hypothetical scenario, either my work wasn’t a right fit for their brand, or they’re idiots. That would be my understanding. It couldn’t be because my writing is bad, because I know it isn’t. I’m not the smartest, but I do know my weaknesses, and I know my strengths, which is more than I can say about some of the smartest people I’ve met.

In the world of business, people outsource all the time. It’s part of what makes this global economy so efficient, if only the Trump administration could see this. I know.. I’m not supposed to bring up politics while building my brand, but as an artist I’m also supposed to present the truth. And also, I don’t really care if you don’t like me, so I take my apology back. (I do care if you like me, however. I’d like to nurture that relationship) But at the end of the day, I’m not writing for you. I’m writing for myself. If money happens to accrue, that would be nice, but I’m not holding my breath. And  I want quality friends, not a large quantity anyway.

I think I feel a sense of failure, because I have had to let go, and because I consider myself to be someone with a cool demeanor-someone who sits and solves problems. I couldn’t solve this one as quickly as I would have liked. It’s all good. When I’m holding a print edition, matte cover book in my hands, I won’t be feeling this little pit in my stomach. I’ll be breathing a sigh of relief, because I will know that I’ve been true to myself, even if it felt like, for a moment, that I wasn’t, because I know that just because you feel something, it doesn’t make it so.